Tandem Nursing:
Is It for You?
“For many, the first question that comes to mind is what is tandem nursing?”
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Tandem Nursing:
Simply put it is the nursing of two, or more, children of different ages. And it’s more common than you might think.
Whether you’re new to this concept or have already been doing it with your own children hopefully we can offer you some helpful advice. We’ll look at some of the facts, and myths, related to this type of nursing, where to find more information, and help you determine if this is a preferred form of nursing for you.
Fact one: A woman can nurse more than one child at a time. There are several mothers who nurse three, four, or even five children of different ages. Now while this can be done, in order to do so requires a great deal of planning. This type of nursing is not a spur of the moment decision.
In order to do this type of nursing, the most obvious consideration is: are you going to breast feed? Once you’ve come to an informed decision regarding breast feeding, the next important question is what will be the spacing between the births of your children.
Keep in mind that one of the tenants of tandem nursing is “natural weaning” or allowing the nursing child determine what is best for themselves. The more time between births the more likely it will be that your first born will wean before the second is born.
Myth one: A that a lactating mother cannot conceive. This is simply not true. While nursing, mothers are somewhat slower to return to fertility, whether she is nursing or not a woman’s normal cycle will return in a natural timeline thus allowing her to conceive when she feels ready.
Fact two: It is reported in a survey conducted among mothers who nurse tandem that there was increased bonding between the older child and the infant. Among the comments were things like these: "Baby 1 seems to have a special closeness with Baby 2;" "no resentment and rivalry;" "fosters closer sibling relationships;" "a unique relationship with her brother—a very gentle beginning;" and "close bonding to each other."
Myth two: Tandem nursing makes it harder to lose weight. Several mothers were concerned about not being able to lose that “baby” fat that seems to accumulate during pregnancy. In fact, mothers that do practice this type of nursing report little difference between the time required to return to their pre-pregnancy weight than those among more traditional pregnancies.
Overall, the most current studies into this type of nursing indicate that there is a more than positive outcome for mother and children than with mothers that do not practice it.
Now let’s examine some of these benefits.
Aside from those already discussed, several mothers who practice tandem nursing report an increased sense of parental satisfaction and bonding with her children. This “natural” bond is shared with all children being nursed.
Are there drawbacks?
Yes, but even these disadvantages can be overcome by simply being aware of them and addressing them as they occur. One of the biggest disadvantages is social pressure. Already there is some negative social pressure regarding mothers who choose to breast feed, especially if they do so in public.
There are many misguided notions about an “appropriate” age for children to nurse. Be prepared for a lot of questions about your decision. Any successive pregnancy can bring emotional changes and occasionally even a sense of frustration with the child being nursed. Here again, being prepared is your best defense.
One last thing that most mothers report as being most helpful is your having a support system. This certainly would include the father of your children. Another good source is the La Leche League. This organization can put you in touch with women trained in tandem nursing.
One final suggestion, this is a major decision and should be treated as such. Go on the Internet, check out your library, call your child birthing center and get as much information as you can before taking on the challenge of tandem nursing.
And remember: motherhood is not a competition.
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